First Crabby Digs - Part I

I haven't blogged in over a year so please bear with me as I flex my writing and try to get back into things. I've posted so many things on Facebook and keep hearing from people that they can't wait to hear what happens next. So, with that thought in mind, to quote the famous Paul Harvey-- these blog entries will be the 'rest of the story.' In my mind, I live a hum-drum life-- not too exciting, nothing extravagant, just kind of "beige." I guess funny things/unusual things/ crazy things happen to me all the time and I just have become so accustomed to it that it's nothing special to me.

That said, I've just recently been "gifted" three hermit crabs from the county fair after attending with a good friend and her family. They were obtained from a game of "skill," a game whereby ping pong balls were thrown from a distance toward small goldfish bowls. Get a ball into a bowl, win a hermit crab. Uh, yeah, never play with a kid that's about 20 years younger than you-- he'll hit the mark more often than not.

The cost was $5 for a gallon bucket of ping pong balls so I plunked down my Lincoln and starting tossing the balls at the bowls. I had already gone through 20 of the roughly 50 balls in the bucket and hadn't hit anything. I had the anticipation of wanting to get lucky, but also the apprehension that if I did make one of the bowls-- what in the hell would I do with a hermit crab?! I already have two dogs, two cats, four chickens, 2 African clawed frogs and about 10 pond fish-- I think the Inn is full!

My friend's brother (the kid who's 20 years younger than me) came over at this point, grabbed roughly 10 balls from the bucket and landed two of the 10! Ching, ching, two crabs! A few more tosses and ching! Another crab! We were racking it up! Next thing I knew, the Kid gave another $5 to the Carnie and again, after a few throws, ching ching! Two more bowls hit! Two more crabs! Yay!

Oooh, Shitake mushrooms! FIVE FREAKING CRABS!!  I was caught up in the moment of winning, of greed, of wanting to take the creatures home! Then, a glimmer of reality set in and I realized how much space those five crabs would need. Not to mention that I know absolutely NOTHING about taking care of such a crustacean. The Kid was beside himself with excitement and announced loudly to the Carnie that we had 5 total crabs coming to us. I looked at the Carnie and said "uh, can we just have two?" The Carnie, grinning with fewer teeth than a stripped gear wheel, grunted "limit's two!" Whoo hoo! I could do this! Two crabs! They'd be buddies and I would be the Fairy Crabmother! Oh boy!

I gave the Carnie the $5 needed for the special plastic case and he put two squirming, writhing hermit crabs in and closed the lid. "Here ya go!" he announced as he handed it to me. I raised the container up to have a closer look at my new inhabitants. Hmm, they looked creepy-- yet kind of cool at the same time. Kind of like a Sigourney Weaver "Alien" kind of thing. This would be fun! I wanted to rescue them from their wild home with the carnies-- I wanted to make them a habitat that would make all other captive crustaceans jealous. In between all of this crab dreaming, I also came up with the names; George and Steve. It seemed fitting.

I carried the crabby plastic case through the fair as if it had a delicate art piece in it-- shielding from any bumps or unnecessary knocking that might happen as I dodged the masses of bare bellies, tattooed arms, and sticky fingered screaming kids that wanted "ice cream!" After saying goodnight to my friend and her family, I made my way to my car which was parked in a grassy field outside of the fair and set the container down on the passenger side floor of my little purple FIT. "Okay, George and Steve," I said-- I've got to find a home for you.

Options on crab habitats in a small town on a Saturday night after 9PM are kind of limited. At least, that's what I discovered. I opted for the local Wal-Mart and thought that perhaps I could find some food for them and something to tide them over until I could get the proper "crabitat" for them the next day at the overpriced commercial pet store. What I found was a round, plastic, container that stated all over the outside of the box "Hermit Crab Home." Ohh, how perfect! I checked the price, under $20! I briefly calculated the cost so far for these creatures, $15 (two buckets of balls and the plastic carrying container), so what was another $20? It would be all I needed-- I wouldn't have to spend anything else. After all, I kept seeing the statement on the hermit crab home that hermit crabs were great first pets-- that meant inexpensive, right?